The Day I Almost Cost A Teller Her Job

I needed to pay my rent, and wanted to do it in dollars, so instead of going to an ATM (more fondly known as "bank-o-mat") I decided to take an attempt at going inside and getting money off my debit card through a teller. I walked up to the counter and asked if this was possible (some banks here will let you and others won't). She took my card and began the transaction. When it got time to inspect my passport, the confusion started. I could tell she was having trouble reading it so I offered to show her the information she needed.

"Your last name is Amber?" she asked.
"No, my last name is Jackson."
"First name?"
"Lori."
"Ochestva?" (a form of your father's fist name, used for identification in Ukraine and other former soviet countries)
"We don't have Ochestvi. My middle name is Amber."
very confused look.
"You can type it there, where the ochestva should go, or you can just leave that blank. They know Americans don't have ochestvi."
"Birthday."
"3 April 1983"
"what is this?" (pointing on my passport to the city Charleston)
"that's where my passport was printed. It's not important."
(and so on and so forth)

I sign a bunch of receipts and write my cell phone number on the back of one of her copies at the last minute. She returns my card and passport (since that time the embassy lost my passport, I'm paranoid about handing anyone anything of such value and and watch it like a hawk.)

An hour later I've made it to Emily's apartment. We're going out later to meet our friend Michelle. Sitting on her piano bench my phone rings. I answer it and on the other end is the lady from the bank in a panic.

"I need you to come back as soon as possible."
"I'm busy right now. Can I come by in the morning"
"I need you to come right now?"
"what's the problem?"
"there was a mistake."
"What time do you close?"
"In 30 mins."
"there is no way I can make it back in 30 mins. What time do you open in the morning? Can I come by then?"
"What if I call a cab for you? We need to close out for the day and I really need you to come back."
"A taxi won't help me get there within 30 mins. There is a traffic jam. Can I come tomorrow?"
"I'll stay here until you can get here. Anytime tonight. If you don't come tonight, I won't have a job in the morning."
"ok, I'm on my way."

Emily and I call Michelle to say we'll be late. Get on a marshrootka and head back to the bank to see what the problem is.

She had charged my card wrong. We redid the transaction. Signed a bunch more receipts, and as I began to walk away she thanks me profusely and insists I take a box of chocolates.

Only in Ukraine :o)